They visit with families and the patients a couple of times a week - and sometimes more - to ease the journey into the afterlife.
All the workers and volunteers have chosen to help their patients through a process that most people try not to think about:
Death, and what happens after they're gone.
Blue Ridge Hospice provides in-home care for terminal patients in Winchester and Frederick, Shenandoah, Warren, Clarke, and Page counties, along with western Loudoun County.
It also has an eight-bed facility at 333 W. Cork St. in Winchester for patients who must be monitored by the staff at all times because they cannot take care of themselves, or their families can't provide for them anymore.
Hospice care is covered by Medicare and some insurance companies, but Blue Ridge Hospice has ways to provide support for those who cannot afford it.
All of the clinical workers work closely with the patients and their families, sometimes to the point where they keep in touch with the survivors after the patient has died.
With life and death so closely intertwined, it might be expected that the losses and the grief would weigh heavily on the hospice workers' hearts. But instead, upbeat attitudes and friendliness are the norm.
The environment certainly can create a level of anguish, but the hospice workers have learned to deal with it in their own ways.
Karen Oleksa, a Blue Ridge Hospice volunteer for 11 years and a member of its board of directors, has seen many patients die, but has learned to deal with the grief. "I think initially, you know why you are there and you know that the patient won't be with you always. But one of the hardest things is to leave the families sometimes," she said. "You become a part of the family almost and it is hard to say goodbye."
Oleksa spends time with the patients and the families in their homes and offers whatever assistance she can.
She talks with the patients, runs errands for the families, and generally does whatever is necessary."As you meet the families, you try to be supportive and you try to do your best to help them," Oleksa said.
She has come to accept that her patients will die, and she deals with that as well as she can."I usually am sad for a couple of days, and I think of that person off and on for a couple of days, and it just gradually fades away more because you are involved with another patient," Oleksa said.
She said her first experiences with death were difficult. She spent more than a year with her first two patients, and both died within a week of each other. "Those first two patients will always be in my heart," Oleksa said.
Lisa Eiland, a registered nurse who has worked for Blue Ridge Hospice for 10 years, must keep her distance at times:"We have to be careful about our professional boundaries. Even though we become intimate with the patient and the family, and enter their homes and their lives, we still have to walk that fine line."
Regardless, even if she is not working on a certain day, she will call a patient to check up.
Nicole Hartman, a social worker at the hospice, believes it is difficult not to get involved."You're human, and it is impossible not to get attached to some people," she said.
Hartman provides help for families and patients by giving counseling and reuniting relatives that may have drifted apart. She has even gotten people out of jail for the day so they could say goodbye to a family member.
Eiland said she and her co-workers have found ways to deal with the environment they work in."I think if you take care of yourself, and the grief that we are exposed to and the tragedy, it doesn't permeate with us," she said.
Jennifer Martin is a registered nurse who speaks to doctors, hospitals, and nursing homes to determine who needs hospice care.
She said her work with the patients is rewarding.
"I think we get more out of making them feel better than they get from us,"Martin said, her eyes welling with tears.
Eiland said she enters the home of a patient and gets to feel the love of the family. If it is not there, she gets to be the one who provides the love for the patient.
Everyone associated with Blue Ridge Hospice said that being surrounded by patients who are going to die has given them more appreciation for their own lives."Hospice is an affirmation of life," Eiland said. "It's not a place for someone to say, 'Well, there is nothing left to do.'"
The patients who have been brought to the Cork Street facility are upbeat and lively, even though they know they are not going to live much longer.
Dan Danforth, 85, of Stephens City, was at the hospice facility for a couple of weeks. He died on Friday.
His heart once stopped and he was officially dead, but Danforth was revived by doctors at the hospital."I did all the things you do when you die, but the doctors brought me back,"
he said in a recent interview.
Danforth said he received more attention and care at the Winchester facility than he could get at home. "The care in the home is fine, but it is nothing like being here."
He decided to get hospice care after his daughter could no longer take care of him at home. Danforth said she was running back and forth from home and work each day while also taking care of her 15-year-old daughter."She was coming every morning and taking off from work. I thought they were going to fire her for sure," Danforth said with a smile.
Even though Danforth knew of his impending death, he remained upbeat and active. He painted and told stories of the days when he sang with Dean Martin and Frank Sinatra in Atlantic City, N.J.
"He used to call me the singer's singer, because I could sing everything,"
Danforth said of Sinatra.
Danforth said he made peace with the fact that he was going to die years ago."I have had a fulfilled life," he said.
Bill O'Leary, 78, of Woodstock, has breathing problems and various other ailments.
Like Danforth, his life is nearing its end.
O'Leary received hospice care at home, but needed more assistance, so he came to the Winchester facility.
He left after a brief stay, but realized he could not take care of himself.
"Everyone wants to go home," O'Leary said. "The older you get, the more you want to be home. But I realized that I needed to come back pretty fast."
Even with his ailments, he is alert, talkative, and full of praise for the care he receives."They are beautiful, absolutely beautiful. I call them my angels," he said.
O'Leary said the hospice nurses and especially the volunteers have been extremely helpful.
They have even bought him gifts.
O'Leary loves dogs. He was walking by a gift shop and mentioned that he liked one the stuffed dogs. It appeared on top of his television set the next day."You dare not say anything here or they will grant your wish," he said.
O'Leary, who can't breathe without a respirator, has few problems with his impending death."I'm comfortable with the inevitable," he said. "We are all going to do it."
When he is troubled by the thought of death, O'Leary said the hospice counselors and staff help him get through it.
Andy Bettis, 53, of Winchester, has pulmonary fibrosis - scarring of the lungs that makes it difficult to breath and restricts the flow of oxygen to the bloodstream.
A friend who is a nurse told him about hospice care, and his wife did research on the subject before he came to the Blue Ridge Hospice.
Bettis said he has had problems coming to terms with his mortality, but noted that the staff has helped him tremendously."The first week I was down a lot," he said. "They worked with me through counseling. Whatever you need, they'll do."
He said the people at the hospice have helped him to accept his illness and its ultimate outcome. "There is not much you can do about it. You just have to accept it," he said.
The hospice has even provided counseling to Bettis' 12-year-old daughter.
"I don't know what I would have done without them," he said.
The volunteers and medical staff at Blue Ridge Hospice give themselves to the treatment of their patients and try to keep things as positive as possible.
Martin said people hear the word "hospice" and immediately think of death, but the service is much more than that. They work to provide the best possible support system for the families and patients.
"Some people think when we are there, we are focusing on death. We are not,"
Martin said. "We are there to focus on life."
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Blue Ridge Hospice is based in Winchester at 333 W. Cork St., Suite 405, and can be reached at 536-5210 or (800) 238-5678. It also has an office at 232 S. Main St. in Woodstock, (540) 459-8630.
-Mark R. Dorolek |
